The house next door to me is going up for sale soon and I’d like to delay that process as much as possible. What would be the most annoying music I could play when prospective buyers are next door?

  • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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    10 days ago

    When German people go to hell, or skiing, they are forced into little tents, served shitty overpriced beer, and are subject to repeated blows to their ears by a type of parasitic earworm whispered fearfully only in dark circles as “schlagermusik”.

    Once exposed to it, it eats into their brain and gets behind their eyeballs, forcing them to wear manic grins, and tap tables to the weak, incoherent, barely thought out beats drumming mercilessly into what’s left of their soul.

      • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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        10 days ago

        Let him who hath understanding
        Reckon the Month of the Beast
        For it is a Human Month…

    • guillem@aussie.zone
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      10 days ago

      Years after leaving the German part of Switzerland I still get A!-tem!-los! in my head out of nowhere sometimes :(

    • FireWire400@lemmy.world
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      10 days ago

      When German people go to hell, or skiing, they are forced into little tents, served shitty overpriced beer, and are subject to repeated blows to their ears

      That’s pretty accurate, actually. Same goes for “Apres Ski”, which is the same but more annoying and sexist.

    • Zahille7@lemmy.world
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      10 days ago

      There’s a McDonald’s down the block from me that plays nothing but Christian music all the damn time. I honestly feel bad for the employees.

  • Stovetop@lemmy.world
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    10 days ago

    I’m just going to say Nightcore.

    I get that Nightcore has an audience, but what makes it annoying for me is when I am trying to search for an obscure song and think I’ve found it, only to realize that it’s yet another low-effort nightcore remix.

    • BmeBenji@lemm.ee
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      10 days ago

      “Wonderful Christmastime” by Paul McCartney is the worst song of all time and I’m willing to die on this hill

    • Snot Flickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      10 days ago

      I submit that these songs aren’t necessarily terrible but terribly overplayed to the point that they’re painful.

      I swear half of Mariah Carey’s fortune is Christmas songs alone.

      Also the whole “Boomers spent their entire lives and our entire lives trying to re-live their own childhood Christmases,” since the majority of original Christmas songs are from that period.

      Also some people love Christmas music so this could backfire.

  • Today@lemmy.world
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    10 days ago

    A low pitched hum that they don’t even notice until they leave and appreciate the silence when they’re away from it.

    • Snot Flickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      10 days ago

      They want to dissuade buyers by being a conspicuously noisy and annoying neighbor to the point that the house sits empty for a while.

      Which, like, if your first thought is to do this, maybe you actually are an annoying neighbor and you’re doing everyone a favor by letting them know.

      • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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        10 days ago

        Hey at least they’re open with it. I’d have love to have known that my neighbours were cunts before I’d move in. Sometimes a simple sign short of a burning poop bag is a nice olive branch.

      • Brkdncr@lemmy.world
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        10 days ago

        They are going to only get neighbors that also suck, and since it has to sell lower it will lower their own home value.

        OP is really punching their own nutsack here.

    • Anissem@lemmy.mlOP
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      10 days ago

      Family member wants to buy it and we want to dissuade other potential buyers. Plus the old owners are dicks so fuck ‘em.

        • Anissem@lemmy.mlOP
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          10 days ago

          The only way to defeat a dick is a bigger, floppier, girthier dick

          • TassieTosser@aussie.zone
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            10 days ago

            Hey uh, this plan can get you sued under tortious interference. So remember to not brag about it. Also much better way is just to take up a noisy hobby like woodworking, drumming or fixing motorbikes.

            • Anissem@lemmy.mlOP
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              10 days ago

              I’ve been wrong before but I don’t see this post linking back to me.

    • Theo@lemmy.world
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      10 days ago

      Cam here to say this. The beat was catchy the first time I heard it but it is so annoying when they repeat the same thing 200 times in a song. Not creative at all .

  • pH3ra@lemmy.ml
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    9 days ago

    There’s always the risk that people who visit the house next door are into whatever annoying music you’re playing and end up moving there and blasting it for the rest of your life

  • daggermoon@lemmy.world
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    10 days ago

    Just play loud ass black metal. The music doesn’t have to be bad, It just needs to scare normies.

    Edit: I thought of the most annoying music ever. Crunkcore! Play some Blood on the Dancefloor and people will fuck off to avoid listening to that shit.

  • hperrin@lemmy.ca
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    10 days ago

    I mean honestly through a wall the only annoying music is thumpy bass with a big subwoofer. Unless you’re playing it suuuuuuper loud.

    • Anissem@lemmy.mlOP
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      10 days ago

      They’ll be looking at the backyard for this property so walls not needed. There’s only about 6 feet that will separate their property from my Bluetooth speakers.

  • BreadOven@lemmy.world
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    9 days ago

    What’s that dolphin-sounding song someone played during sex in that meme? That.

    Alternatively, the brown note (assuming it’s real).

    Or like hardcore noise stuff. Is “Wall of sound” a type of it?

    Edit: How could I forget Ram Ranch?