I know you’re joking, but semi-related, I highly recommend the Kuhn Rikon peelers.

I sense ADHD (source: am ADHD)

I hate myself for buying a John Deere tractor, but it was up to $5000 less than any comparable competitor at the time, included a 5 year service contract, and was 0.9% financing.

I’m in a better place financially now, so when I can and need to, I’m absolutely getting something different.